Category: Dogs

Dogs

A Star is Born

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A Star is Born, what a beautiful story that was all too close to my own. For me the becoming a star was my launch from working in the theater (backstage) to having a very successful career in IT. And, having Charley get so jealous and resentful of me when I got my job at Microsoft. And, my loyalty to him — even through the cruelty, addiction, and his recovery.

The one tiny detail they nailed, and probably went unnoticed, was the dog. The dog was sitting outside of the garage when Bradley Cooper’s character killed himself.

When I found Charley. Lucy and Thelma were laying right next to him. After he was gone, Lucy would sit by the door and watch for him. It was heartbreaking.

I feel it’s important to tell these stories — to not sweep feelings under the rug. I know this kind of story is not what people want to read on a sunny Sunday morning.

It’s made me who I am today…which is someone that stands up and lives her truth. I just wish there was a way for others to get to this place without having to go through this kind of life altering event.

Dogs

The Days Between

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Originally posted on Socci.com November 11th, 2015

Between the day Charley died and the day he was cremated I took off work.  I am so very lucky to have a job and manager that supports me during this time.  I spent most of that week in shock.  I can look back at it now and realize that is what it was.  Along with having to pass the news to people, plan the funeral/cremation/memorial.

Charley had been attending meetings and was gone most evenings. So around 9-10 PM every evening I would think he was going to walk in the door.  Then when I reminded myself he was not, I would go to bed.

The hardest things that week was watching Lucy grieve.  I think at this point she knows he’s not coming back.  But for awhile she sat by the front door, or in the yard looking down at the HAM radio antennas.  Like Charley was going to emerge from the lower part of the yard and hang out with her.

Lucy Waiting

My neighbors are incredible.  My KIA decided to not start the moment I was suppose to head to the funeral home.  So I jumped into Charley’s Volvo and went to the funeral home.  My neighbor, who is good with cars, jumped it, took it to the auto parts store, and put a new battery in it.

My other neighbors brought me food, every night for awhile until I told them to stop.  I had forgotten to cancel my Blue Apron delivery so I had a box of food fit to prep 3 meals for 2…with 0 motivation to cook.  I also received 2 huge fruit baskets.  I finally juiced the oranges and grapefruit for a delicious drink, and cut up the apples and pears and made a “crisp” dessert out of them.

Grieving is such a process…like an ocean…sometimes calm and other times the waves just hit you and knock you to the ground…and it’s OK.